regenerate

April 19th / 21st, 2010:

Written somewhere over the Pacific Ocean, between Guam and Manila:

It’s funny how I lived a life barely accounting for love. Love is the surprise element which brings current plans crashing down and gives birth to new ideas which bear absolutely no relation to previous ways of thinking. It’s nonlinear and non-rational and so much more than just an emotional or chemical response to life. I believe it’s the glue that holds the entire universe together.

I fell in love again, and again I didn’t expect to. With a boy and with a city – both of which changed my life in ways I could never foresee. Both enabled me to understand myself and to push further into the unknown when there was so much fear.

I do not move back – I move forward. I can never return to who I was before love found me and I am perfectly okay with this. The universe is expanding and we move into more and more love. Sometimes we encounter forms of love that we cannot recognize at first glance.

It’s funny, I feel like I can think more clearly here in the sky. Life ALWAYS makes sense from this perspective – maybe not so much from the ground. I feel connected here – to other human beings, the planet, the cosmos. I am just beginning to see my part in all of this.